Reasons Women should go out with Me
- If you let me take you to dinner,
you get free food.
- I give incredible back rubs.
- Pets seem to like me.
- Smiles and laughter: free with
every interaction.
- Would you want to be known
throughout history as "the one who let Michelle get
away"?
- Good news for me: my mother is
still alive. Bad news for you: inlaws!
- Better news for you: My mother says
you will like her more than me. (friends have confirmed this)
- I love to laugh, and make others
laugh.
- Sarcasm, included after 3 months.
- Yearly vacations.
- I take a shower at least once a
day.
- I do my own laundry and have never
put a red shirt in with the whites.
- I only tie women up and spank them
when they ask me to.
- I understand the difference between
their, there, and they're.
- I am gainfully employed.
- Though I enjoy an occasional drink
I am more than happy to be the designated driver on all occasions. Get as
drunk as you like.
- I'm magically delicious.
- I have a flat screen and video
games--you'll know where to find me on Saturday nights.
- I own the right tools and know how
to use them. (real tools)
- Four out of five dentists recommend
me.
- New & Improved Michelle, now with
5% more wackiness than the old Michelle.
- I am cleverly disguised as a
responsible adult.
- I'm cute and cuddly.
- I don't just want to
grope your body.
- I'm not easy, but we can discuss
it.
- Take me now. There will be plenty
of time for normal people later.
- I only look innocent.
- I don't cheat on my partners or my
income taxes.
- I'll respect you in the morning.
- My baggage fits nicely under the
seat in front of me leaving room in the overhead compartment for other's
larger baggage.
- I have The Sound of Music
and Hairspray on DVD, we can watch whenever you want! (I also have
over 500 other DVD’s I’m sure we can find something)
- I've never said no to a woman who
wanted to have one of her girlfriends join us in bed. No woman has ever
asked mind you but I see that as a technicality.
- I’m a big kid, I want the cool toys.
'nuff said.
- I can often hold up my end of a
conversation.
- I’m told I am romantic. I just
believe actions speak louder than words.